Merry Christ’s Mass everyone!
I awoke this morn to discover a pishing burst pipe in my kitchen. Holy jebus! Second burst pipe came just as me and my loved one were resting our steaks. It’s been nuts in the aul Northern Ireland. I pity the birds but they don’t seem to want my coleslaw that I gave them. Did you know that pigeons can recognise all 26 letters of the English language? They also are monogamous and are not the ‘flying rats’ that folk think they are. They bob their heads for better hallway vision.
It’s -9 tonight. To be honest I’m waiting for the ceiling to cave in, or a fire to start, or maybe a direct asteroid hit. Check out my Christmas tree.